Up, up, up, there's no where but up from here

Up, up, up, there’s no where but up from here

April 2, 2018

I was listening to the radio today when Shania Twain’s hit song ‘Up!’ started to play, I immediately turned up the volume and started to sing along. As I sung along, I started to actually listen to the words a little closer. It struck me as odd as I knew the words and distinctly remember playing this song over and over and over again in 2004.

It was my second serious relationship and I had ended it. I was completely heartbroken and sad but something deep inside of me kept playing this song over and over and over again. Each and every single time I got into the car, I would hit play and repeat on this one song. I bet if I were to look at this CD, there would be a very deep groove where this one song is located on it.

It seems weird as I don’t know what kept me playing this song but my grief, it was as though I was reciting this to myself as a mantra…if I said it enough times I would believe it. Weird how the brain works?

I knew my heart was broken into a million little pieces and the only way I knew how to get back on my feet was to keep telling myself that it would eventually get better. Apparently I did that repeatedly without actually knowing it. Don’t get me wrong I know every single word to this song and can recite it to anyone…but at the time I was just singing it and saying it not actually comprehending it, until now 14 years later. Wow!

This song helped me to get to where I am today. It helped me to build myself back up when I didn’t know if I could. It helped me to believe in myself, love and life again.

I still enjoy hearing this song and will always hit repeat on it when I get the chance. Not sure if it’s out of habit or out of love. Either way it helped to heal my broken heart and I suspect many others out there too.