Shattered Dreams

It's still been three months since it happened and we're still feeling the effects. Neither of us saw this coming; we were living in a euphoric state of mind...

The boyfriend and I had just finalized the dishwasher choice for our new home and were ecstatic to get to the builder to let them know the good news. We also had ulterior motives as we wanted to see if the blue prints had come in yet. Upon our arrival we still had the giddy look on our faces; you know the one new home owners get when they've completed all of their "shopping" tasks. That look was quickly replaced with complete and utter horror when the builder said to us "...we've been meaning to call you guys to discuss a change." The boyfriend I quickly glanced at each other wondering what they meant; neither of us changed anything??

After pulling us into an office and in our persistence they explained to us that the house we chose couldn't be built on the lot we picked. Reason being was because the architectural guidelines had changed and the builder wasn't made aware of these changes. The previous statement is partially true because had the builder done their due diligence they would've known that the house they sold us, that I put money down on and had done all the "shopping" for was not allowed to be built there because it didn't meet the guidelines.

This information would've been so useful before I invested 3 months of my time. Not only was I emotionally attached as I had everything picked out. What do you mean by everything you say? Well if you've ever built a new house before; you know after signing the purchase agreement that you have 21 days after that to go and meet with the electrician, the flooring people, the lighting company, the appliance people, the paint people, the cupboard people and let's not forget the railing, the windows, the door knobs, the doors, the counter tops, the counter top height, the cable outlets...this list could go on...they all have people associated with them because these are all choices that have to be made. So needless to say we were both pretty pissed off because some of these people don't work on weekends forcing us to miss work and make these choices.

After the madness wore off we tried out damndest to get a house plan to work. Unfortunately the builder presented us with house plans that were somewhat thrown together. Despite our efforts we were forced to walk away from the deal and here we sit three months later and still no closer to our dream home...

I think the reason it hit us so hard was because not only were we buying a house, but we were making that first big step together. Moving in together, it was the first big step for our future. Now we are forced to start over but with a bit more perspective under our belts. So our journey continues with our gained knowledge hopefully our dreams will no longer be shattered but fulfilled.

We have started looking again and it seems that there is nothing out there that comes close. Have our standards gone up? Yes. Will they ever come down? We're not sure...

My Independence Home

***Just a note, that I wrote this a few months back and just found it the other day...thought I would post it anyhow***

It took me 29 years to feel that slice of independence that everyone kept telling me about. Although I left home at the ripe age of 16, I moved in with my Aunt; prior to that I had only lived with my family. After only a year and a half of living with my Aunt, I moved back home to try living with my parents and siblings again…that only seemed to last a short period of time and low and behold I got a place of my own. I was 18 and bartending, I figured with the tips I made that I could afford to live on my own. I think I spent about two weeks of living alone when a friend and co-worker asked if she could move in with me. Hesitantly I agreed and that began my love affair of always having a roommate. 


Year after year I would move in with someone new; some roomies lasted longer than others...but still I didn't know what it truly meant to live alone. Until I finally did it; I bought a place of my own and decided I would not let anyone move in with me and I would learn to love living alone.

At first I didn't quite get it; it was so quiet. I will admit I was a bit lonely as there was no one to talk to...but as time went on I learned to love it. If something was a mess, it was because I made it. If something was missing, it was because I misplaced it. I loved this new found freedom of "making it" on my own. I felt so liberated.

For almost 3 years now I've been living alone, but recently my boyfriend and I purchased a house together. Exciting, yes. It’s all I can think about, I honestly can't wait until we move in together. Part of me is scared because we've both lived solo for so long, we have certain routines. But part of me is happy because we'll now get to see more of each other. I know that we'll have that awkward stage of wanting to kill each other, but that will pass knowing that we've both contributed to the purchased of this new home.

While it is sad that I must sell my 'Independence' home, I feel good about it because I know another chapter of my life is beginning. So for now I must bid adieu to my 'Independence' home so that I can move into my 'New Chapter' home. Besides experiencing the joys of living alone in my 'Independence' home; without it I would've never gotten the chance to move into my 'New Chapter' home. So for that...Thank you 'Independence' home.